Presuppositiona= Pre-Supposes, that which has to be in place in order to…
So previously we looked at Pre-Suppositions around the areas of “Experience & Perception” the beliefs and ideas that are in place, or were in place, whether you knew it or not, the good news is you do know now, and now as you know, we will look at Pre-Sups around People and Behaviour and like every great Netflix Series here is a very brief intro:
God Damn…you skipped the intro
Well as your not a paying subscriber I want you to sit and watch these words and absorb the following for the next 90 seconds…
Pre Suppositions are the Attitude… the attitude to get when you become not an A Therapist, but the-The-rapist, I meant Therapist, it’s an a–tit-dude that as a professional (don’t scoff) there is so much that we don’t know about our clients however we have to fill in the blanks and that’s where these pre supps come in ( long summary- sorry)
People & Behaviour
Remember People are mostly thick when it comes to explaining what they do, if you ask some of these dummies.
Why they do, what they do?
Then after an eternity watching them go through there trans derivational search eyes flickering, mouth wide open gurgling and choking on their own flem, it’s almost as if you have unplugged the cretin from the Matrix and now you are watching them go through an epileptic fit and after they finish frothing at the mouth you get the response “JUST”….
Every behaviour has a positive intention.
Even seemingly destructive behaviours often arise from a positive intention—typically to protect, avoid pain, or gain something meaningful. NLP encourages separating the behaviour from the intention. This opens up the possibility of finding alternative, healthier behaviours that serve the same purpose. For instance, someone who procrastinates may unconsciously be trying to avoid failure or judgment. By identifying the positive intention, we can offer new strategies that honour the deeper need while promoting growth. This belief fosters compassion, reduces self-judgment, and supports transformational change in therapy and coaching.
2 more to go and a story “My Neighbours…”
There is no failure, only feedback.
Failure is reframed as a learning opportunity. Every result provides information, even if it’s not what you wanted. This presupposition encourages resilience and experimentation. In the NLP mind–set, outcomes that deviate from your goal aren’t mistakes—they’re guidance. This belief reduces fear of failure and motivates you to take more action. For example, if a presentation doesn’t go as planned, instead of seeing it as a personal flaw, you can analyze what happened, learn from it, and adjust. This mind–set can become empowering and essential for growth.
People make the best choices available to them at the time.
Given their current resources, knowledge, and emotional state, people make the best choices they can. This does not mean their choices are ideal or moral—it simply acknowledges that from their perspective and context, they didn’t see a better option. This presupposition fosters understanding and reduces judgment. It’s particularly helpful in trauma-informed coaching or therapy, where people’s past choices often reflect survival strategies. When people expand their awareness and gain new tools, they naturally make better choices.
People already have all the resources they need.
This presupposition is deeply empowering. It suggests that within each person lies the potential for healing, creativity, and transformation. The role of a coach or practitioner is to help the individual access and activate those internal resources—such as courage, calmness, determination, or joy. Rather than giving people solutions, NLP practitioners guide them in discovering their own. This belief shifts the focus from dependency to empowerment, reminding us that solutions often lie within, not outside ourselves.
Story Time:
My neighbour’s husband died leaving her a wealthy lonely widow and as “every behaviour has a positive intention” well for me anyway. I ask her out on a date we already have great rapport (I made sure of that on previous encounters) and the missus is still at work so I have a few hours to use productively and realising the cinema has a buy 1 get 1 free offer. I ask my lonely cougar of a neighbour out on a date to the cinema and once there we find all the shows are crap so “we make the best choice available at the time” and watch a random movie. Once in the cinema screen, I casually put my hand on her knee whilst reaching over to get the pop- corn again “every behaviour has a positive intention” and once we are embraced and tongue wrestling the intention is definitely positive, the gentle touches before were all “There is no failure, only feedback” and if at any stage I was pushed away that would count as feedback and if the feedback got so bad. I.e. neighbour came to actually watch a movie, then “People make the best choices available to them at the time” I could have got up and left, asked the neighbour/date to pay for the ticket or I could simply lick my wounds instead and apologise. Remember, “People already have all the resources they need” and if the neighbour is a No Go for NOW then I may need to employ some of the remaining Pre Suppositions.
